Anonymous
|
Open Question
What should I do in this Situation?
The Situation:
During my first semester of school, I've been really itching to talk to this girl that I have a crush on (let's call her "Beautiful") in my class. I was too nervous and never took the action to talk to her. Several months later, I gave a speech to an assembly of kids about my struggles with alcohol and how I almost drank myself to death. The day after the assembly, she Face booked me saying that she really respected me for doing the assembly, and that she had some similar problems of her own. I replied back and told her that I'd be more than happy to get together and talk about it. So I started talking to "Beautiful" in class and we made plans to meet at Starbucks. At Starbucks, she told me about her personal problems, and I was shocked on how similar our stories were. I gave her support and listened very carefully on what she had to say. When we talked we kept eye contact, and she smiled ALOT. So I was thinking to myself, maybe we have some chemistry? After our little get together, we exchanged numbers and I told "Beautiful" to give me a call anytime she needed help. A week later we met up again at Starbucks because I needed some math help, and she helped me with it. I then asked how she was doing with everything, and she seemed stressed about a lot of stuff. I gave her advice and the support she needed. She then asked if I wanted to come over some time and teach her how to box (I've been boxing for 3 years). I agreed and we talked about it. After that, we left Starbucks. I felt like it was okay to give her a hug good bye, so I did, but it felt REALLY awkward. For some reason, I kept tripping about how she invited me to come over. I thought about it a lot, and was getting some idea that maybe she likes me or something. I also couldn't stop thinking about beautiful she was and how we related to a lot of things. We texted each other every now and then. On the last day of school, she said she wanted to give me "something". I was getting a lot of weird thoughts in my head. Was it a kiss?? So when we met in front of the school, she gave me a TIN OF COOKIES that she baked for Christmas. I was a little let down, but I tried the cookies and they tasted great. I let her know that! Then a couple days later, I was on my way to an AA meeting. She texted me saying that we really needed to hang out because she was stressed out again. I called "Beautiful" and let her know that I will call her back as soon as my meeting is done. After the meeting, we met at Starbucks. I got in "Beautiful's" car and listened to what she had to say. After our talk, she drove me around. (I was sitting passenger) She showed me where she lived, the old High school she went to, and we went on some Haunted Road. I almost pissed my pants when we were on that road because I got really freaked out. She actually stopped the car so I could run out and piss in the woods. lol. We talked about random stuff in the car, and kept the conversation going. I kept thinking whether or not she likes me as a friend. We drove back to Starbucks and sat in her car. We propped the seats back and talked more and more. NOW. She then brought up the main thing I was tripping about ever since I met her. HER BOYFRIEND... She said she's in a bumpy relationship with a guy who's in college. Let's name this guy "Tool". So "Beautiful" and "Tool" have been dating for 9 months. "Tool" has a problem with the clothes she wears, who she hangs out with, and has cheated on her in the past. I was completely let down. I kept my cool, and asked her, "Why are you dating this guy??" She just shook her head and said I dont know. I told her that I wouldn't give a hell what clothes she wears, and she could wear overalls for all I care. I told her how cool of a person she was and that she didn't deserve this. She kept looking into my eyes, and I was beginning to think that she might lean over and kiss me. But I kept my distance, and knew that kissing her would be wrong because she is indeed in a relationship. I wanted to so bad.. After the talk, I leaned over and gave her a hug and reminded her how cool of a person she was. I got out of the car, and she drove off. I texted her to drive safe, and got into my car. I rested my head on the steering wheel and thought how dumb I felt. I asked all of these questions to myself. - Does she like me? Does she think I'm a better guy than that asshole? Does she think that I like her? Does she only think me as a friend? I don't know...When I got home, she texted me saying that she really feels comfortable with me and that she would tell me anything. I told her that I felt the same. Then she went to sleep. I couldn't sleep the whole night. I kept thinking about her, and wished she was with me, instead of "Tool". I really don't know what to do. I want to tell her how I feel, but I'm afraid it's going to ruin our friendship....
 148 day(s) ago
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