Anonymous
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My best friend, husband and I have all been very good friends through the last few years. So much so that the lines of our friendship became quite blurred between all of us and a few months ago they admitted to me that they had feelings for eachother that went beyond friendship. I was very understanding, i love them both. my husband is the most wonderful man in the world and it was very easy for me to see why she'd want him after all the let downs in her life. and my best friend is a beautiful person inside and out. and although i knew it was driving me crazy i didnt want to give up any of this RELATIONSHIP that we all had together. she practically lived in my house with her two kids (she's a single mom). They were here for every holiday, every sunday dinner it was the eight of us (our three children, her two, and the three of us). We often joked about her being the "other wife" because we worked together as a family unit and i will be honest i did not want to give that up dispite their "feelings". They admitted to the feelings though they swore they were not in love and would never disrespect me or cross that line. They both had tremendous guilt over their feelings. then something horrible happend. something changed and though they knew the pain it would cause me, they started txting and calling and seeing eachother without me. our little "trio" excluded me, and before long they were in love and having a full blown affair. Both love me very much, but both love eachother very much too. the sex between them is not even a tenth of the problem. they truly are in love and had a fantasy that we could all live one happy life together. sharing him is not something i am capable of doing. although i will admit i love them both and am so afraid of losing both, especially the man i have loved for 16 years, that i have considered their wants before my own. but in the end...it would drive me crazy to watch him come home at night and go to her bed every other night. i love him and the life we have built together so much. he truly is an amazing man. thats how he got into this problem. he has so much love to give and just wanted to take care of her and her kids. and now its too late to turn back. it was obvious what was going on and did not take long for me to find the proof. its been three weeks and everything is so broken. he is a very broken man. he truly loves both of us and never realized how much damage it would do not only to me, but to her and both my kids and hers. everyone around us is damaged. but he is so utterly broken at the thought of living without one of us. in the end he knows he will resent her for the destruction of the life he had if he chooses to be with her. and there's no gaurantee that he and i will be able to work things out either. he is in a deep dark hole that he cant get out of and its very very sad to see this once strong man crumble so. my advice as the wife...please dont ruin your friendship, thier marriage, him if you care anything about this man. be honest with them, and take a huge step back, even if she is understanding. distance yourself for a while until you are able to move on. in the end my heart is broken not only for me and for him, but for my friend. she has lost everything dear to her. the "family" that made her one of them, the friend who would have done anything for her, even the man that she loves more then anything now will never be hers. he'll maybe never be anybodies as he isn't whole any more. but she has lost everything that mattered to her. and so did her kids and mine in the process. someday they'll all be old enough to connect the dots to all the turmoil we're going through and it will effect the way they view us, trust as adults, and have relationships of their own someday. its very very painful for all of us and there is no way that anyone is escaping this without many scars. some unhealable. good luck to all of you. i hope you make better choices then we did....
 Posted 186 days ago
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